Time
Last night as we got into bed,
it occurred to me that Athena, our dachshund, will be 8 this year. I'm not entirely sure how that's possible for
it was just yesterday that she was placed on our front porch while my sister and
brother in law anxiously hid behind the bushes waiting to yell
"surprise!" My husband did not have pets growing up and when we
received her the South Florida (read national) economy was plummeting due to
the housing crisis. It was a scary and
difficult "time." He was very apprehensive those first few weeks with
her. Today, their nightly goodnight kisses
could make the warmest of Hallmark cards seem steely and cold.
8 years, how could all that time
actually have passed? For all that we as a global civilization have learned,
have we fully come to comprehend the concept of time? My answer is: no.
The English language is riddled
with sayings and quotes about time, in fact, I'm sure you could think of two or
three this very instant.
Time waits for no one.
A stitch in time saves nine.
Time is money
What a waste of time
Equally, we toss about the word
"time" flippantly and almost irreverently. "Yea, I do that all
the time" or "did you have a good time?" When we ask someone
"did you have a good time?" What we are actually saying is "did
you enjoy yourself during that increment of your life?" Increments, the building blocks, the atoms,
of time.
As is our inherent nature as
humans, we try in vain to manipulate time in the same fashion we try to
manipulate so many other cosmic forces in our life. We try to speed time up, slow time down, and
in what is probably our most foolish mortal endeavor, we try to stop time.
We need only to look at a
current magazine to see how many celebrities do their best to stay "frozen"
in time. Only by going online and researching can we know a celebrity's actual
age. It would seem that 90 is the new
40.
As I walk through our home,
every item has a marker, a time stamp on it. My wall of Greek icons, I started
collecting those almost 30 years ago. I
got my first one as a gift when I was 13.
They speak to my soul, they ground me. The oil painting of the yachts in
the harbor, we picked that up at a thrift store about 6 years ago. I still
smile at its beauty every time I walk by it. My favorite Harrods mug which I
bought on a New Year’s trip to London 11 years ago, I keep it towards the back
of the shelf. I only use it on weekends and special occasions. In fact, I hand carried it in a backpack
along with my jewelry during our last move.
These markers although they can
be quantitatively frightening at times, are scenes in the movie of my life thus
far. They speak of the time I have
spent on this earth. While the physical
items give us a timeline to our existence, it is the things which cannot be
physically touched that truly allow us to appreciate the sometimes harsh and
sometimes splendorous qualities of time.
Through time, I've come to realize
that my parents are my closest friends. At this age, I am beginning to relate
to them, their struggles, their stories.
I enjoy spending time with them, having them over for Sunday dinner
brings me joy. It's great fun at the
time and a deposit into my memory bank for the future. We seldom realize that
bank needs to be funded constantly. It is the mental IRA of our tomorrows. I’ve realized that my husband is one of the
strongest and most selfless people I know.
I thank God daily for bringing him into my life. I’ve realized that I see different stages of my life in the lives of my younger siblings. I’ve
realized that watching my best friend of 27 years battle cancer is one of the
toughest scenes I’ve ever had to watch.
I’ve also learned that there are
several simple things in life that make me happy at a basic core level. I’ve learned that few things can replace the
feeling of reading a good book. I always
have one on top of my nightstand and two or three waiting to be devoured on the
shelf below. I’ve learned that sparkling
water lifts my spirits, I buy it by the case. I’ve learned that I love taking
care of my rose bushes, I anxiously await each new bloom. I’ve learned that the aroma of fresh baked
bread is as intoxicating as the stiffest martini. I’ve learned that watching the full moon rise
over the ocean can center you like few things can. Have I learned everything I “should” as I’m
about to turn 40 this year, I can’t say, just give me “time” and I’m sure I
will.
